Saturday, November 11, 2006

Ahh... My Dear Fellow Scribes With The Prolific Quills -Preditors & Pub-leech-ers Both In Thy Corner- How Very Wrong Thou All Art...!!!

by Luciano Pimentel

And so I see the reactions of the three - J.K. Rowling, Ursula K. Le Guin and... whatsisname... Ah, yes... The Gaiman - Neil Gaiman... 

And I have to scoff at their lack of imagination when comes the time to merely DEFEND THEMSELVES...!

For they stand accused - and rightfully so too - of wasting our time, money, minds and souls even, with the sometimes quite sickening imaginary webs that they weave... Tangled webs of fantasy-filled deception that serve no true purpose, really, and only end up only clogging the arterial system of most of their readers' truth-deciphering filters... Not to say that their faithful readership is dumb enough to mix up reality and fantasy afterwards - however, they waste so much time indulging in barely rewritten myth - they have no time left to open their eyes, look around themselves and properly see what REALITY is or has gotten to! And we all know, at least instinctively, that reality is a million times more biting... Truly, it is time for these readers to get their noses out of these fantasy books and smell the withering roses around them... But I digress...

JKR -in her delusional "pseudo Tolkien wannabee" phase- offers little argumentation of any value to defend her precious little Harry against the hordes of Christian Right - which is right when it says that Potter and the gang have instilled a newfound interest in the occult in so many young readers - an interest that simply wasn't there before, when said youths, still wet behind the ears and all, were hypnotized by the Teletubbies' inaneness... Of course, Harry's satanic rites could have not existed at all, the Pokémons would have still gotten the boys' interest in the occult sky high anyway! But, at least, the girls would have been spared... Unless... Darn - I forgot about Sailor Moon, didn't I?

La Gouine now... I mean, Mrs. Le Guin!
She was seen stating that her first reaction to the Christians who lament that she's in league with the devil for writing so many dragon stories, is to LAUGH... Was it a devilish laugh, by any "chance"? Hmm... Poor argument indeed - and she admits so too! Fine intellect that woman has - very refined as well! Too bad she cannot seem to comprehend that, if dragons existed as she writes about them, they could only be one thing - the devil and his flock of fallen angels! For the likelihood of "goodie-goodie TALKING dragons" existing at all is decidedly NIL.

(No, Barney does not count! And neither did Dino!)

However, the likelihood of there being dragon-or-snake-like demons around, and a big bossy devil on top of that food chain, is pretty darn good... Alas!

Finally, and definitely least of all, la plaidoirie de Gay Man! Oops - he does not write comic-bookies so much anymore...

No easy superheroic twists on his name are allowed anymore...!

Neil Gaiman is an AUTHOR now! Aye...

His main argument - aside from showing scorn and "pity" for "those people"... - is that he'd say to them "all right now, let's PRETEND..."

Pretend? Pretend what exactly? Pretend that your tales are literature? Pretend that your writing brings anything of substance, beyond the sheer entertainment value that equates about the same "cheap thrills" factor brought to us via a thousand and one second-rate horror and slasher films throughout the years...?!? Where we pretend gore is ketchup instead of vice-versa - cause it is, up on the screen, of course... In real life, it's something else though... 

Digressing... Again...

What else are we to "pretend" here?
Oh, yessssssssssss - I remember now! :)
Neil Gaiman's award acceptance speech! ;)

The speech in which he PRETENDED that there was a huge crowd of assorted creatures before him... And he actually wasted his breath -and everyone's time- in naming them all too! (In short, he thanked "the goblins, the fairies, the elves, the smurfs" - ok, maybe not the smurfs... HOW COULD HE; HE'D BE SUED BY PEYO'S ESTATE! And he continued on and on, thanking everything else IMAGINEABLE indeed...! It was rather an embarrassing attempt at trying to conceal the glaring fact that there was no one else there and he was alone in someone's backyard accepting his (equally imaginary?) award... But I am digressing again here...)

That exercise sure was imaginative... As much as recycling can be, that is!

That sure was, also, and again, a grandiose waste of time! Bravo! (Incidentally, I think it is where I saw it too... On Bravo! - the Arts Channel! Lest it was on any other television channel concocted and devised by TV mogul Moses Znaimer specifically to waste our time! And siphon our money as well - but that is another story... Administration and squandering of tax funds goes on *the lunacy blog* - not here! Maybe on *the lucrative blog* too... 

Although I could fear now that I might be turning into the Znaimer of Blogland at this point in time...! But that is another story, as well! *LOL*)

In short, Gaiman tries to validate his right to waste our time and vampirize our wallets - with the simple catch phrase "let's pretend" - to which he could add "oyé, oyé - fine gents and finer ladies - come and see the spectacle and make sure to pay the piper!"

He brings nothing to the table, nothing but fluff - and tries to sell it to us by having us "open our minds"... But just to PRETEND! It is in his best interest to do so, of course - like the huckster of olden days, the hawkers and barkers of old, the charlatans and swindlers of bygone eras... He has something to sell -preferably for the highest, most over-rated price possible- and he will not stop short of ANY available tactic, cheap or not, to go forth and sell it to the highest bidders that are indeed out there...!!!

Tis verily more the art of salesmanship than the art of wordsmithing at work here...

A writer's talent should not be used like that.

Suspension of disbelief is best when it operates on grounds that are BELIEVABLE, REALISTIC and most of all GENUINE.

A writer should use his GOD-GIVEN TALENT to open his readers' eyes to DEEP TRUTHS - not stuff them shut with so much fluff and fantasy! We have enough fairy tales from the wondrous world of POLITICS - we need not more of that crap!

If we want to write about the entity called Death, we should be realistic about it - all evidence points at it not being nice one bit... If we want to write about witchcraft, we should make it crystal clear - speaking spells, for whatever purpose, is evil. The power behind it has to be from the devil - nothing else! So-called "witches" that only delve in herbal remedies are SOMETHING ELSE ENTIRELY...! But those would make for boring stories - right, JKR? And... I already stated what dragons should be treated like... Even Ursula Andress could grasp that - why can't Ursula K. Le Guin?!?

Next time you feel like laughing, the three of you - laugh at yourselves, even if all the way to the bank... For you're quite funny in trying to legitimize thy brand of fraudulent activities...

You've swindled millions, the legal way...
Be happy with that.

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